Tuesday, July 29, 2014

The Recap That Really Isn't

My visit with Frances was lovely, sexy, hot, fun, wild, and a bit drama filled. Loyalty is a strong and mysterious bird. And I will be completely clear and tell you that loyalty to my friend and respect for her wishes are the only thing that is keeping me from filling you in on the extremely sexy details. It bothers me a lot to have to censor, but I love her more than I feel the need to share a hot story here.

So why even bother mentioning it if I'm just going to be a tease and not give the low down dirty details? Because this blog is meant to be a diary of my sexual journey; where I can tell my secrets to strangers and have a creative outlet for feelings that I can't disclose anywhere else. Its a part of me and even if I am not at liberty to tell this particular story, I want a placeholder here, for myself especially. Because it happened and should be marked in time in some way. And this is my way.

What I can and will do, however, is share this photo from our weekend of debauchery and say that it was part of one of the sexiest and sweetest encounters I've ever had. If I think of it that way, maybe I can temper the nagging bit of resentment that twinges at my brain because I'm restrained from recapping it for reasons I don't agree with. Maybe it can be ok to keep the details of what truly happened during that few days close to my heart and only known to the three people involved. Its a delicious secret that I can relive in my head and have for always.

xoxo,
Bella

Monday, July 14, 2014

naps, sex, and short weeks

Mr. Man and I took advantage of a rare afternoon without the child and had a nice romp in the sack. (That expression is so cheesy, I know). Granted, I had to wait until after he was finished watching Dexter but that was ok because I got a nice nap in as well. Two of my favorite things...a nap AND sex, in the same afternoon!

Its a short work week for me because on Friday I get to hop an early flight to go visit the always beautiful and fun Frances for a couple of days. I am SO excited! Giddy would be an appropriate description for how I feel about this.

And now, sleep.

xoxo,
Bella


Sunday, July 13, 2014

Ethan, Part II

He opened the door to Room 119 of the same hotel as last time. He was naked and had a glass of whiskey and Sprite in hand, ready for me. I could tell that it was going to be a good night.

And it was.

He even let me handcuff and blindfold him and do as I pleased. That was new for me, as I'm the one usually being restrained. I'm not sure I'm good at being the Dominant one. Actually, pretty sure I'm not. I prefer to give control than take it. But far be it from me not to try new things. Life would be incredibly mundane if you didn't, right?

He fucks like you'd expect a 20-something to fuck. Long and hard and fast. But he cuddles the opposite, slow and sweet and adorable.

We played, cuddled, and talked for a few hours and then hugged and went our separate ways. Sexy, non complicated, and fun. Like this is supposed to be.

xoxo,
Bella
 

Thursday, July 3, 2014

Peeking in to say...

I love and hate how I crumble when he tells me I'm beautiful. Its always the bad boys isn't it?

Sunday, June 15, 2014

missing

Some reading of erotica, some interracial porn, some remembering past encounters...one masturbation method for each of the three orgasms I had tonight.

And just as I typed that I got an OkC message from a 22 year old kid asking if I'm looking for a sub. Not tonight kid, I'm in the mood to be Dominated instead. I miss that so fucking much.

The box in my closet just sits there, collecting dust and waiting...collar, leash, flogger, cuffs, spreader bar, blindfolds, binding equipment, etc...all the things needed to put me into that mental space where I can float away in a fog of pleasurable pain and submission. All the things except for the big strong man to use them.

You know that look I get. The pleading eyes, the tears that come when you've slapped my face just hard enough to give me that twinge of fear in my gut that stirs me like nothing else. The breathless "yes Sir", running mascara, and fire red hand-printed ass. Pussy dripping juices down my thighs and I will do anything to please you, anything to taste you, feel you inside me. I ache for the firm grip of hands holding wrists, gripping my throat, pulling my hair, cupping the back of my head as you invade my mouth with tongue or fuck my face until I gag. A powerful man who I trust on top of me, holding me down and spreading my legs.

Most times I can push these desires to the back of my head and distract myself with regular life things, or at least with yummy, albeit vanilla sex. But when that need to be Dominated pushes it's way to the forefront of my thoughts, I can hardly stand it. No outlet except my fantasies. Its almost suffocating.

If I ever find that again, I won't let it go.

xoxo,
Bella

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Flakes are not cool

Ok, I don't get this.
Why would a guy ask you to get together over and over again and then repeatedly flake? I would think he wasn't into me except that HE is the one asking ME to get together. I never contact him to set anything up. Ever.
So he contacts me, we schedule a time, and then he either has some reason he can't at the last minute or he doesn't respond at all on the day of. Which is what happened today. I don't get it.
Hey Dave, stop it.
Xoxo (to everyone but Dave),
Bella

Tuesday, June 10, 2014