Saturday, August 28, 2010

this is all so, like totally, high school. totally.

So, I mentioned a while back that I ditched Mr. Jr. High and Jake. Basically because they are douches. (Irony? Jr. High is trying to chat with me on facebook right this second). Gah. So here's the deal with those two...

Mr. Jr. High:
This one has/had a tendency to be ultra charming (not) and text or pop up on chat with "u wet?", or "yep". I mean, really. Seduction is not his strong point. Which was fine in a way because I knew where I stood and what he wanted from me. That being phone sex. And the occasional teasing invitation to fuck in real life. But it was getting old and why do I need to be treated like that anyway? I mean, phone sex can be hot but at least make me want it, make me want you. And so I told him that my phone sex days were over, see ya.

Good god, this very second the dude is trying to get me to call him. Fuck. I told him he doesn't give up very easy and he said "no ma'am, I want you. I love that voice. One last time?" I told him I wasn't in the mood, he says "whatever", I say "you might want to work on your seduction skills. just sayin'." He said "yeah, u 2". What the fuck?! Seriously that just pissed me off. But reinforces my very correct decision to kick him to the curb and hope he falls into the path of a semi. Or at least one of those bicycles messengers going really fast.

Stupid fucker. So done with that.

Jake:
This one is a bit more complex. Long story short, a few weeks ago we had a playdate and in my opinion, he stood me up and treated me like shit. In his opinion, he never got the time off work and is virtually clueless.

We'd been trying to get together for a while but schedules weren't meshing. He was finally supposed to get Friday off a few weeks ago and said he wanted to spend the whole day with me. On Thursday I text him to confirm the next day's date. He says he thought it was the next Friday. Um, no, but whatever, I'm off the next Friday as well. He says "good". I do not hear from him all that week but I assume we are on for that Friday.

So I do all the prep work a girl does before fucking a guy she really likes for the first time. You know, grooming the privates, shaving, tanning, mani/pedi, picking just the right outfit and lingerie...oh yeah, I went all out for this dude. Waste.Of.Time.

Friday comes and I hear nothing. I vow not to text or call him. I mean, why should I have to? He hasn't bothered to even say hi, how ya doing in a long time so why should I be the one having to make the first contact all the time? Sigh. I'm wondering all day if he's gonna call and I felt like that girl in high school, rejected by her crush. So I'm pissed but still don't contact him. And I don't for a couple of weeks and never hear from him.

But then I cave.

I text him "I don't know whether to be pissed at you or concerned, so I'll be both. Are you ok?". I mean, I honestly wondered if he were dead in a ditch somewhere. He does drive a really hot bike...

He said "Yep, I'm ok, just stuck at work and can't get time off."

I say "you might consider letting a girl know next time".

He says "I'm sorry".

I don't respond.

The End.

This wouldn't be as big of a deal for me if he and I hadn't once been really close friends, then lost touch but later reconnected more intimately (as much as you can on the internet anyway), and gotten to be close again. And then it went cold.

Its a complete mindfuck and I don't need it.

Which makes me question myself and wonder what is it that I'm looking for exactly. Am I looking for "just sex" with random people? Or friends with benefits? I obviously want to be respected as a woman and as a person and not treated as just a piece of ass. Although I kind of wish I could take that approach sometimes. Leave the mind and emotions out of it and fuck blindly for the simple sake of fucking. And its not like I want to be attached to a partner, but I don't want to be treated like trash either. How hard is it to say hello, how are you? I guess I just want to actually LIKE the other party and have them like me back. Which is why the Jake thing bugs me...I like that guy a lot but he seems to be on a different plane now, for whatever reason. I'm not sure what happened. Anyway, I'm writing him off as someone who used to be my friend and almost became a fuck buddy. But didn't.

Goodnight.

xoxo,
Bella

7 comments:

  1. Mr Jr High's behavior seems appropriate given the nickname you've given him, a man knows seduction, a boy doesn't yet, he has a LONG way to go.

    And Jake? He's just assuming you're his and being completely disrespectful, he also needs the semi- or at the least the bicycle messenger treatment!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I totally agree with you. Some men do not know respect. Keeping in touch isn't so hard either and goes a long way. They aren't worthy of your attention, obviously.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Seriously - we must be talking to the SAME idiots! I keep having the same issues. I think mine are already attached though or something. Totally ruining it for me though. :(

    ReplyDelete
  4. I haven't seen so many so-called adults acting this much like kids in a LONG time!!!!

    Sheeesh...

    ~shoes~

    ReplyDelete
  5. This whole question of what I am looking for seems to be the crux of my problem. Definitely looking for sex, but I also want a bit more too. Sometimes I think I may be TOO respectful, if that makes any sense. In my way I fail to really let my prospective partners know just how interested I am.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hang in there my dear. It just means that neither one of them is right for you, or they would respect you much more. They are obviously not what you are looking for, you deserve better.

    ReplyDelete
  7. You do deserve much better. Keep looking!

    ReplyDelete