that suitcase ain't gonna pack itself

I'm heading to spend the next few days with Frances and Bruno! Super excited to see my sweet sexy friends and drink, lounge around naked, maybe do some shopping, and just generally turn in my adult card for a few days.

Currently, I'm procrastinating on packing by telling you this.

gawd, I love burlesque

Some Saturday nights are just meant to be epic. It's written in the stars or maybe in the sparkly costumes of my favorite burlesque dancers.

It's no secret that I have a serious love of all things burlesque and lucky me...we have a fantastic local burlesque scene. Mr. Man and I went to a show this past weekend with a large posse of new and old friends. We had VIP tables up front and it was GLORIOUS. The performers were sexy and funny, as were our companions. There was much flirtation and a bit of public touchy-feely time afterwards with a new girlfriend while her man watched. Grrrrrrr.

I love sexy shows and new crushes. 

tassel twirling

Fancypants date night is coming up this weekend with Mr. Man and friends and motherfucking BURLESQUE baby!!!! I ez sooo excited!!!!

Did I ever tell you about that time Frances and I were in a random hotel room and I did a tassel dance for her? The boobies were swingin' that weekend for sure. I miss her. But lucky for me, there is a trip to a bucket list city with her and company on the horizon! Bring it.

Peace, love, and pasties!

Now I'm of consenting age to be forgetting you in a cabaret. Somewhere downtown where a burlesque queen may even ask my name.

- Panic At The Disco

brain turbulence

Life can feel so out of control. And that's when I crave to BE controlled the most. I'm fortunate to have found a partner who has been able and willing to give me some amazing submissive experiences lately, but real life logistics and events have precluded a very consistent outlet for this and will continue to do so. In the grand scheme of things, it's not important I suppose. But it is a strong want, dare I say a sexual need for me.

As alluded to, things have been crazy lately. I just returned from a much needed escape to visit Frances. It was lovely, as time with her always is. We did fun sexy things, and fun touristy things. She is an excellent hostess and I would have stayed another week if it had been possible.

I know I still haven't written about Mr. Man and my foray into a poly-esque relationship with new friends and I'm not sure how to go about that really, as it's been a roller-coaster of emotions and events. It has been a huge part of our lives these past few months and a continuous learning experience for all of us. I'd like to sort it all out in my head to relay some of it here. Soon, I hope.

Sometimes I truly feel like I'm falling apart. Today depression and panic hit me like the proverbial ton of bricks and I felt like I was losing my way. Which is much easier to do when you aren't sure what your "way" even is. I feel like I'm floating between lives yet not fully grounded in any. I fight against the often overwhelming urge to flee. So far I haven't, obviously, but I wonder if one day I will just snap and take off for Buenos Aires or at least across town.

Hey Bella, stop being such a fucking downer.

xoxo,
Bella

girls playing with toys

Given the fact that my first visit with Frances occurred three months ago and I am going to visit her again in a couple of weeks, and yet never finished my recap of the first girl on girl fun....well, basically, I suck. And so, to avoid getting so far behind that I never catch up and you miss out on some sexy toy talk, here we go....

Frances and I had suitcases full of various sex toys that we wanted to try out on each other. And try them out we did! There were vibrators, clit stimulators, dildos, strap ons, clamps, etc. You name it, we had a lot of it. Favorites quickly emerged and we spent the most time with those, and some things we tried and then discarded.


One of the things that we tried that I had no idea whether I would like or not was the strap on. I had always wanted to be fucked by a woman wearing a strap on and Frances was happy to oblige. I had no idea what to expect. Was this going to be hot or just bizarre? It was a bit of both and yet, bizarre isn't really the right word. Just...different. I must say that Frances looked wicked hot wearing it (although I don't have a pic of her in it, but if she wants to share that I'll let her do that at her place) and she knew how to use it. Wink wink. For me, penetration has never been all that. I can't climax by penetration alone and this was no different. The experience was erotic and hot but not something I have to necessarily do again to be sexually fulfilled. It was fun to try and I'm very glad I did. But we soon moved on to more enticing playthings....

Now, can we talk about these nipple clamps puhlease! So much fun. And more so in a silly giggly way. I put these on and became a mad woman...dancing around, singing, trying to shimmy and do that tassel twirling thing that my burlesque dancer friends are so damn good at. I failed miserably at being sexy in them but fuck they were fun. There is video evidence available somewhere on the internet of my feather nipple clamp antics. Disclaimer: I may or may not have been aided in my song and dance routine by a bit of Jack Daniels. It was hysterical. And look how cute they are! Like little chinchillas attacking my tits.


But lets focus on my favorites shall we? I was surprised that these were the things I wanted to spend the most time letting Frances use on my wet and willing pussy.

Introducing, the njoy. Frances brought two of them. The Pure Wand and the Eleven. Oh goodness y'all. The combination of cool metal and Frances's skills with these toys drove me insane in a very delicious way. These things are serious business. The weight of them is sexy. The look of them is damn beautiful. And the feel of them...just plain Grrrrrrrr.


A word of caution: do NOT drop the Eleven on your toe. It is HEAVY as fuck. And really loud when accidentally falling off a hotel room bed.

Frances was SO good at using these on me. Whew. And I'll admit, these toys intimidated me a little at first but I soon got over that as Frances teased my dripping lady bits with the cool metal, her fingers, tongue and a few of the vibes we'd brought. I am not so secretly hoping that she pulls these babies out of her bag of tricks in a couple of weeks on my visit.

Thus ends my recap of the sex toy extravaganza in room 334 of a random hotel in AnyTown, USA. Too many months have gone by for me to recall every detail but I hope you got the gist. My time with Frances proved to be both sexy and comfortable. Exciting and cozy. It was sooooo nice to click with a woman who I want to talk to, giggle with, cuddle, and fuck. It was the perfect balance of vanilla and kink. She's damn awesome.

I am so excited to see Frances again and am privileged to now call her one of my dearest friends, in addition to my girly love. Love you baby! See you SOON!

xoxo,
Bella

sweet sexy girly love

My ass. Frances' hand.

So I lied. This next post in the retelling of my sexy weekend with Frances is not going to be about the sex toys.  I think I'll save that one for my last installment. Besides, tonight I'm feeling less raunchy dirty girl and more sensual sweet girl. But let's get to it...

Alcohol. Liquid courage is always helpful when you're unsure of yourself. It had been a long while since I'd kissed a woman, much less enjoyed the fruits of lady bits on my tongue. My memory is fuzzy as to the timeline of events, but suffice it to say that with the help of Jack Daniels and Diet Coke, I was soon ripping Frances' pants from her body. What followed was, as Frances put it, what guys probably imagine happens at a girly sexy slumber party, minus the naked pillow fights.

Once the offending clothes were gone, I couldn't keep my hands and mouth off of her glorious breasts. So different from my own, I was a bit fascinated by them I'll blushingly admit. By how they felt under my hands, how her nipples reacted to my mouth on them. I touched them. A lot. What can I say? I'm a boob girl.

She was very responsive, which I loved, and told me when and how to adjust my actions to suit what she liked. And her pussy...her pussy tasted so fucking good. Sweet and wet and delicious. I found the act to be rather natural and I have no idea why, given my lack of experience. Although it makes sense to me that its quite an intuitive thing; for a woman to perform oral on another woman. I loved knowing that my mouth and tongue were giving pleasure to another female. She gladly reciprocated and I found her mouth to be heavenly on my nethers. She treated my lips to the delights of her own and seemed to know when and how to lick, suck, and finger me. Whew. Girly love is hot y'all.

We kissed, we fondled, licked and caressed. She even spanked me, knowing I like a rougher hand at times. It was such an erotic thing, exploring each others' bodies, feeling the softness that only another woman possesses. It was so...sensual, yet also very comfortable. I loved the cuddles. The ease of how our bodies fit together while spooning was so freakin' adorable. We snuggled and continued to touch each other while we talked and finally, slept.

It wasn't all sweetness and soft touches however. Sex toy testing was next on our list of activities and I definitely had my favorites. With pictures to prove it. Next post, promise.

xoxo,
Bella

first encounter of the girl blogger kind

I'm struggling a bit with how to recap my weekend with Frances. I suck at remembering timelines and recounting what happened first and then such and such happened, etc. I think I'm better at describing the emotions behind the actions so maybe that's how I'll approach posting about this.

Frances and I had been chatting every day for weeks and quickly realized that we got along great, had a lot of things in common and yet, a whole bunch of differences that never left us lacking for things to talk about. Once the idea of meeting came up, we moved on it quickly because, well, why not? We figured out a city that was almost exactly a midway point, booked a hotel room, and the next thing I know, I'm driving five hours north to meet a "stranger" from the internet. Ain't life grand?

I pulled up next to her in the hotel parking lot and I think we both gave each other goofy grins and spastic waves through our car windows. Hugs were exchanged and off we went to claim our weekend hideaway. The guy at the front desk kept trying to switch the original room I'd booked with a king bed to one with two beds. As if two bi-curious chicks meeting for the first time wouldn't actually WANT to share a bed. Sheesh dude. We politely refused his offer at least twice, and lugged massive amounts of over packed luggage up to room 334.

The timeline of events is all jumbled in my head. I do know that we spent the first portion of our time together cross-legged and lounging on the bed gabbing like it was the hen party of the century. Seriously. We talked. A lot. I was relieved to find that Frances was easy to talk to and laugh with. This was going to be a good weekend with a new friend regardless of what else might happen.

That evening we ventured out into the city to make some serious hot lovin' to 5 Guys. Damn those burgers and fries were goooooooood. I'm just going to go ahead and tell you that Frances and Bella can put away some 5 Guys, Cracker Barrel, Reeses, Doritoes, and Skittles. Oh and adult beverages. This was a no guilt, no diet, no holds barred weekend.

Next post....the sex toys come out.

xoxo,
Bella

helping a girl out

My friend, let's call her ViVi (vibrator virgin), texted me first thing the next morning: "Happy Hustler Day"! Meaning Hustler Hollywood of course. You know the place. Mainstream, bright, cheery, non-threatening sex store. That was our lunch hour plan, to hit up the local Hustler for some girly goodies.

My plan was not to mention the vibrator issue to ViVi again but to pick one out that I thought would be good for a first-timer and then give it to her in the car. That worked out well but I'm getting ahead of myself.

Like I mentioned before, ViVi is no prude but I was a bit surprised at her reaction in the store. We went in and were greeted pleasantly by the sales staff, as per usual. We perused the "vanilla" side of the store first, the side with the lotions and cute outfits and gag gifts. Then we hit up the sexy stuff. And the sales team pounced. And by pounced I mean a couple of things. One, that I was hit on pretty obviously by the guy checking our ids. He overly flattered me and told me how young I looked, how he loved my tattoo, how our birthdays were only a few weeks apart, blah blah blah. It was cute but a bit much. I blew it off and pushed him out of the way to get to the dildo aisle. I keed I keed. But really.

Definition of pounced #2: I'm used to this store as I am a fairly frequent customer and was a bit freaked out when I first started going in there at the bluntness of the staff. "Can I help you find a particular butt plug?", "This vibrator will hit your g-spot better than that one over there.", "This porno features squirters and look, it's 10% off today only!", etc. I have since learned to embrace their enthusiasm for their job and utilize their expertise if I need to. This freaked ViVi out a bit. She was obviously uncomfortable with the overt helpfulness and sort of hid behind a display of bondage toys while I debated the pros and cons of various clit stimulators with a very nice salesperson (not Mr. Flirty).

ViVi ended up buying some pasties, stockings, a silly Cosmo game and some ruffly panties while I purchased a nice slender bullet vibe and some shaving lotion for my nether regions. When you purchase a toy, the cashier always tests it for you to make sure it works because you can't return it. There was a new employee being trained and the experienced salesgirl walked newbie through the steps and script to test my toy. I think I made ViVi even more uncomfortable when I joked with the cute newbie salesgirl about being her "first". Heheh. What can I say? I'll flirt with a girl just as much as with a boy. I'm an equal opportunity flirter, no sex discrimination here.

On the drive back to work ViVi goes on and on about the intrusive salespeople and how weird it was to her. You know that saying "thou dost protest too much"? Yeah, like that. I expressed my opinion that its just their job, just like the salespeople in electronics stores or wherever. She wasn't buying it but finally got it out of her system and shut up about it. Just before we got out of the car to head back to work, I handed her the bullet vibe and say "this is for you". She was thrilled and says "YAY!!!!" with somewhat embarrassed enthusiasm. I think she was expecting it but wasn't going to say anything unless I brought it up first.

A couple of hours later I'm driving home and get this text from ViVi....

"OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE THE BEST FRIEND EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Mission accomplished.

xoxo,
Bella

never used a vibrator? doubletake

I was having some girl talk with a friend today and we were talking about sex, of course. She was telling me about some sexual issues her and her guy are having and that they had had pathetic two minute unsatisfactory (for her anyway) sex last night. I had jokingly mentioned to her earlier in the week that she ought to get a vibrator (never dreaming that she didn't already have one) and she'd changed the subject. But during this conversation she blurted out "I've never used a vibrator before" and then she continued to blather on with the story she was telling. My brain however, was trying to process her statement. She seemed a bit embarrassed about it and stammered something about reading the PostSecret about the chick who didn't want to use a vibrator because she was afraid it would ruin "real sex" for her. Puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh-lease!

I was a very late bloomer sexually but now I think I'm pretty much caught up, haha. This girl is in her late 20s and is in no way a prude. She's what I would consider pretty sexually free and has had more partners within the year and a half that I've known her than I have my entire life. So for her to never have used a vibe before blew my mind. Although I guess maybe she never needed to use one, always having a real penis available. But I can't imagine not having the option to get off whenever I wanted with my toy, regardless of if my man is around or not. It makes me wonder if she's ever masturbated with just her hands...I'm kind of guessing not. Actually, as I am typing this I remember a few months ago when she and I had gone to our local sex store and she had declined to go over to the side of the store where they sell the porn and toys. Hmmmm, there's a clue.

My response to her unintentional confession? "Girl, I am buying you a vibrator tomorrow. Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday to you missy and you can thank me later". I told her that the toy can be an addition to sex with her man, not a replacement for him. Then I gave her my own confession, namely that I can't climax with penetration alone so a vibe during sex is perfect for me! Poor girl is probably scarred for life now with my TMI.

And so tomorrow I will do a good deed for my friend who has been missing out all these years! I'm thinking a Rabbit or a nubby bullet would be a good choice for a first timer....

xoxo,
Bella