Joe

This town and it's hot musicians y'all. I can't even stand it sometimes. Just when my cynicism about the state of the open/poly/non-monogamous male population reaches a peak, along comes a total sweetheart like Joe. It's been several months ago that we met on OKC and I honestly can't even remember what our first conversation was like but I think I'm the one who messaged him first. Maybe. Even that's foggy. He just seems to have always been around. 

I do remember our first meeting however. Lunch at a local bar. I walked in and there he was, in all his blue-eyed, bearded glory. Sometimes you just get a good feeling about someone and I liked Joe immediately. I do remember that rush of nervous awkwardness within the first few minutes of introductions and initial conversation*. Then food arrived and maybe a beer but I don't remember. We talked about our jobs, relationships, our open/poly marriages and how different experiencing that and being that in the South versus "out West" can be. 

There's always this pause after a meal or a drink when you wonder if the connection is mutual, what happens next, etc. All these thoughts happen in a matter of seconds. In this case the next step was an obvious "I'd like to see you again, how about a walk right now?" And so we did. We walked around a nearby park, peeked through a fence at a guitar shaped pool (it was on Music Row, after all), and then got snuggly on a park bench for the next half hour. After it was obvious that we both wanted this to go further, Joe was openly affectionate. As my tweet says, he is a hand-holding, back-rubbing, arm-around-your-shoulders, hand-on-the-small-of-your-back, kissing kind of guy. That kind of physicality in public is not really Mr. Man's style, so I welcomed the refreshing intimacy of it. 

Since that first meeting many months ago, we've seen each other semi-regularly but not nearly as much as either of us would like. There have been several hot and heavy make-out sessions in the car, blowjobs, sexting, sweet dinner and lunch dates, and I even played groupie and went to one of his shows. Due to logistical circumstances, we didn't have sex for what seemed like forever. It was glorious torture. Finally schedules and stars aligned and we got a hotel room for a night. Whew. There's nothing like sex for the first time with a new person. Does that sounds slutty? Fuck it. I own my sexuality and I love it. 

He spent the winter months in a state far away but we texted throughout. I'm happy to report that we reconnected when he got back and have since enjoyed each others company several times. Ahem. He's good. Very good. He takes his time and knows what he's doing. For the record, vaginal massage is a thing....that he knows how to do.

So that's Joe. Here's to nice guys with beards who enjoy sex as much as I do.

*Meeting someone new for the first time in this capacity is scary, and a rush. It just is. I'm holding that thought for another post about the psychology of that event.

a coffee date and my brain

Not much to report in the sexy realm these days...that I can write about anyway. I am meeting "Dave", a new guy for coffee tomorrow so that will be fun. Or something. I'm not sure he's my type but I'm bored and have some free time so whatever.

I've found myself confiding in strangers a lot lately, which is interesting to me because I always try to analyze myself and try to figure out why I do the things I do or feel the way I feel. Why is it easier and many times less frightening to tell your secrets to someone you don't even know than it is to share them with your closest friends? Maybe because you are less likely to give two shits about what a stranger may think of you after knowing the secrets? Hmmmmm.

The human brain is a many splendored thing...actually no, I think that was love or something.

I'll let you know how my coffee date goes tomorrow.

xoxo,
Bella

new things

Synopsis...Mr. Man is out on a date, things with New Guy (who shall be known as "Cash" from here on out) have been progressing and a meeting is in the works very soon, and my brain finally clicked over, stopped being a bitch and freed me from something that had been holding me mentally hostage for months. These are all good things y'all. And I needed some fucking good things to happen.

So, as I mentioned, Mr. Man went on a first date with a new lady friend tonight and I'm halfway waiting up for him and halfway recovering from some serious masturbation on film. I haven't talked to her but I've seen her picture and she's beautiful. Lovely even. Mr. Man has been chatting with her for a couple of weeks now and is quite smitten. Tonight is their first face to face meeting and sex was not on the table (so to speak) for tonight but you never know what may happen in the heat of the moment and he has full "permission" to do whatever, within our rules. Otherwise, the plan was dinner and the drive-in movie I believe. I helped him pick out his shirt, reminded him to have mints on hand and sent that crazy kid on his way. I'm crossing my fingers that they hit it off, and yes dear readers, you will be among the first to know.

Cash and I have been texting a lot and I'm not sure how I'm going to have my first meeting with him and NOT fuck him, to be quite honest. As I told him, I am cautiously optimistic about this. He's single at the moment, which is new for me, and I think a huge positive. He knows what I want from this and I know what he wants and they are simpatico. Friends with benefits, no strings, no drama, and goddamn it, we actually like each other a lot on a vanilla level. He contacted me on OKC and when I checked out his profile it was way different from the standard drivel, really interesting and well, he intrigued me. He's just...different, in a cool way and so far we seem to click well. Plus, he's hot and is interested in many of the same things sexually, that I am. We're hoping to meet up in the next week or two. Fingers crossed. I've already broken a few rules with this kid...I gave him this blog address, told him my real name, sent him naked pics that included my face, AND fucking came for him on video. If I ever run for public office and dude is pissed at me, I am so screwed.

In other news, I'm finally moving past some things in mah brain and that's good, although there are bittersweet mixed emotions still lingering that will always be there I suspect. My head took a lot of extra time to catch up with the reality of the situation and I am finally there and can breathe again. I know that's vague but that's how it is. Life ain't easy and thank goodness it isn't or we'd never learn anything from it. So sez I.

Oh, and lastly, I took a hot bath tonight and it was delicious. And no, Mr. Man still isn't home so stop asking.

xoxo,
Bella